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Sunday 27 November 2011

7TV Campaign: Jimmy Albion's...Grave Mistake

(Finally, the report of my own game on Friday, which is woefully inadequate compared to the others!)

Jimmy Albion & The Nuneaton Ninja versus The Man From F.R.A.N.C.E.

Prologue:  
Strange signals have been detected in the vicinity of a site containing both an old graveyard and a considerably older stone circle (location shooting at Avebury didn't threaten the budget too much).  Unbeknownst to each other, rival agencies have been despatched to investigate, and bring back intelligence...

"Don't go into the graveyard, Jimmy; it'll be the death of you..."
Action!
Erm...well...that'd be a lie.  Despite the snap-shooting of OSS 118, The Man From F.R.A.N.C.E., this also proved to be another short, sweet and bloodless game (a good thing too, as my opponent, Mr T- no, not that one- had but a scant 90 minutes to spend at the club).  

Essentially, Mr T's Jimmy and his Ninja chums retained the initiative, bounding merrily around the countryside snaffling up objective markers like they were sweets (which, to be fair, they were; given 7TV's 70s globetrotting, international roots, Ferrero Rocher were the only option).

By comparison, OSS 118 was very much on his own.  Van Der Stroell's cameo role meant he was never going to be seen on camera until the start of turn four, and instead of the dependable Ms. Betouche, OSS 118's eye candy in this episode was the ditzy Marie-Chantal.  Resigned to having to do all the work himself *again*, OSS 118 administered an adrenaline shot to himself and managed to pick up two markers (he can't 'alf shift it when he wants to).  Another marker was also picked up by Marie Chantal who- bless her!- had wandered into the crypt looking for somewhere to fix her hair.  This would never have happened if the pragmatic Ms. Betouche had been on the case.

Realising there was no point now hanging around, OSS 118 began to withdraw, but his attention was drawn to a distinctive white tuxedo shining in the gloom from behind a nearby hedge.  A snap shot was sent in the direction of Jimmy Albion (for 'twas he) but the cowardly rosbif was wearing body armour!  At this point, it was time for an ad break....

As was stated at the start, short and sweet indeed.

Production
Well, both shows managed to recoup their expenses, but diverged wildly after that!  Industrial action somehow spread from the S.P.A.C.E. backlot to that of the F.R.A.N.C.E. production team (perhaps it's something to do with all the acronyms attracting the unions?) with actor Harry Vorster (who portrayed Van der Stroell) striking in sympathy.  Luckily the production team pulled a "Darryl" and simply replaced Vorster with Bazza Flosster, albeit at some cost.
By comparison, Sydney Barron- or at least someone close to him- must have taken a close interest in Jimmy Albion et al, as it looks like Department X star Pandora King (Yes! The Pandora King!) is going to be making a cameo appearance in a future episode.  Lucky blighter!

Back in the real world...
The next scheduled broadcast of these fine 7TV shows is due to be Friday 9th December.  Stay tuned!



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